Entry 11
When temptation
knocks how must I answer? The flesh will fail me until I hate the flesh in its
lusting and desiring of things that are not of you. All my desiring flows from
an incomplete rest in you. Oh seeker, you sought for me. I gird myself for
battle. The battle for the flesh is one in which I am weak, but you are strong.
Fount of life you are forever the same. I have no right to seek joy outside of
you, my Lord. I can see the light before I see the sunrise, Father. Call and
shout. Please don’t stop desiring me, Lord, because there are times when I
don’t desire you and my heart is so far from you that I have so thoroughly
convinced myself that I can find happiness aside from you.
Help
me to remember that my spirituality and my happiness and joy is found in my
relations with others. Help me to remember that in this world I am going to
have many troubles, Lord, but that you have conquered the world I live in. I
love you, and you will continue to fight for me even when I can’t find the
strength to fight for you. My spirit is strong, but my flesh will constantly be
weak. Wash away my blindness. I’m alive again.
Lord,
help me to feel what it feels like to be strong in you. This last month, as I
so feel every January has been a struggle. I don’t want baseball to be a source
of stress in my life. I desire to give it to you, and surrender it to you. You have died in my place, Lord. Help me to
remember that there is no resurrection without death. When I am empty, my soul is beautiful for it
is devoid of all that is not you. Jesus, you kept the faith in me. Keep the
faith in me.
You
have delivered me from temptation. I meditate on things that are pleasing,
holy, and good, and you have given me a hope in your name. In the desert of
temptation there is much to fear, and much that can bring a man to the ground,
but in looking up the light of the heavens illuminates the path of
righteousness and the path to joy in you.
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